She feels sick.
Kneeling before the porcelain throne,
She widens the space between mandible and maxilla
And lets cuticles press into frantic uvula.
It pour from the floodgates:
Gastric acid, falcarinol, carbohydrates, corn syrup.
A biology major, she dropped out when she got sick
Of the diagrams,
Of humans being broken
Into things to be used.
That was after she learned he had a girlfriend,
But before she became infertile.
Sodium caseinate, carnegeenan, salt.
She was too fat, they said.
So she dieted,
But kept hungering,
And paid homage to the shitter;
Ever-punctual, she missed only once,
And knew it was all over.
Red No. 40, lactic acid, niacin
She made an appointment
And was forbidden to have an ultrasound.
She remembers the protesters’ faces
And the blind eye she took to the world.
H2O, carbon, hemoglobin.
Each time the gates open, she hopes her aorta will burst
For the heart she stopped
So long ago.