June 29, 2020

my parents are/were divorced
my father is/was dead
I did/did not mourn and grieve
this situation is a dense fog and I cannot see or walk through
I stay on my side where it is clear
my parents were/were not married
my parents’ marriage had vanished before I could root for it
I am/am not my father’s child
my mom would always claim my connection to him when I
looked out for me
my mind is/is not clear
I do/do not mourn Haiti
Haiti does/does not live inside me
I can/cannot hear the drums
there is a schism here
a hairline fracture of a chance
I am/am not an only child
everything became complicated early on and now we are all here
sitting in it
I did/did not cry when my fraile father passed away
I do/do not miss my brother and sister
I can/should reconnect with them
mom said I had to worry about myself for once
I was ten
I have/have not been silent this whole time
I wanted to discover on my own
I do/do not miss Haiti
I do/do not understand Creole
this is/is not very complicated
my dad’s side of the family tells stories from my past and when I
was small

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